Return to Self

I attended an online, guided meditation today because, you know, any port in a storm, right? I've done meditations like it before but this one felt different. This one calmed me in a way that I haven't been calmed in a very long time. After all the breathing and visualization she asked us to rub our hands together to create warmth and then to place our hands over our hearts. I felt so connected to myself. She talked about how we need to send and receive love to all things and I really felt that. 

My sister has been going through a tough time. I can't offer details but it's just a really bad time for her - fear, anger, pain and suspicion. We sit and talk a lot lately. I offer support - she offers support - we support each other. But there is a much wider support network than just the two of us. Our nuclear family, our extended family, our friends and our community are all tied together in such a way that won't allow either of us to fall. Sometimes the support comes from an unlikely source, other times it comes from those you know you can always count on. And that's no accident. 

I was raised to believe that family and community were very important in every day life and I now know it to be true. It's amazing how it works - very organic and seemingly without much effort. I strive to be kind to the people I encounter in my life. (Some would say I'm too kind but that's a topic for another blog...) It doesn't take a lot of extra effort, sometimes none at all. But the rewards are astounding. A nice smile, a kind gesture or a warm hug all go a long way towards improving someone's day. If I can make one person's day better then that's one happier person in the world. Imagine if we all did that, every day! 

Listen, I could easily be a beast about the bad thing happening to me right now or the horrible mess my sister is living through but I think I'll choose not to. I think I'll choose love, compassion and forgiveness. (On my good days anyway 😉). I want to believe that everyone is doing the best they can with what they've been given. People are sometimes mean, cruel, manipulative and deceitful but I think it's because of battles raging inside them. It rarely has anything to do with me. There is no need for me to pass judgement on them because they're being far harsher to themselves than I could ever be. 

That being said, anyone who chooses to mess with my sister is messing with me and my whole clan. We are powerful, determined, smart and brave and we will protect her always. A smart person would understand that and "stand down" - knowing the war cannot be won. Unfortunately that's not the kind of person we're dealing with...