I have officially survived the Holidays. A little bruised, a little tired and wondering what to do with one too many Christmas coffee mug sets. The holidays can tend to be a real problem for me. Over the years of freaking out or finding myself in tears Christmas morning (can’t remember if it was relief or hysteria) I’ve tried to figure out what it is that sends me around the bend. Mostly, it comes down to this. Christmas requires shopping and organization – the top two things at which I am notoriously bad.
The organization part is a big deal. I have friends and family who keep detailed journals of shopping lists – who they need to buy for, what they’ve already bought, etc. My system is a little less, well, systematic. I rush headlong into a buying frenzy, running from store to store, hoping to cover all the bases. Not really armed with a list or anything, just a general notion of what I might need or what I’ve heard the kids mention. I also end up grabbing way too many “Twelve Days of Christmas Coffee sets” for all of the gift exchanges I’m involved in. Did I mention that we went to FIVE family parties this year? I don’t care what circles you run in, that’s a lot of parties. Plus, I see my family all the time and, though I love them dearly, it seems a lot like overkill.
I tried being organized about the whole thing (once) but it didn’t really work out for me. I actually did all my shopping (mostly online) ahead of time and was done by Thanksgiving. I was so proud of myself. I really thought I’d just sit back, sipping hot chocolate while baking cookies with the kids. The thing is that it didn’t work out that way. I still ended up frantically rushing out buying stuff but I maintain that the blame for that falls completely on my kids. Their “I must have this or my Christmas will be ruined” gift changes daily. Try keeping up with that.
I don’t know if it’s true for you, but for me it’s all about making the perfect memories. Let me assure you, in my everyday life, perfect is not an issue. Far from it. My sisters (lovingly) refer to me as the “Whatever Girl” because nothing seems to get to me. I don’t worry about things being “just so” and I can usually just hum along quite nicely. But when Christmas hits, they know that the whole “whatever” gig is out the door. Friends and family tread very lightly around me in December because they know that I’m usually flailing around. My best friend even wrapped all of my Christmas presents one year because I just couldn’t get it together to get it done. Did I mention that she was pregnant and delivered on December 28th? Don’t judge me.
If I’m alone in this you can just read on and marvel at my lack of organization, but if you run into the same issues every year, let’s examine the problem. What is it that drives us into this frenzied Christmas state? I think the biggest issue is that the responsibility for creating a magical holiday season falls entirely on women. Not once did my husband bake six dozen cookies for the school holiday party or volunteer to bring in 18 gallons of fruit punch. He did not practically strangle himself with raffia trying to make a gift look “artsy” to impress the kids’ teacher. Nor did he help to address all of the Christmas cards, even though his family is MUCH larger than mine. Christmas morning was great fun for him because it really was all a big surprise. He had no idea what we got the kids until they opened the gifts in front of him. He did, however go out shopping on December 23rd to pick up “a few things for the kids”. Mothers everywhere will understand my anxiety over this because it is imperative that the two piles of gifts MUST BE EQUAL.
I do have to give Joe some credit. He is a great shopper when it comes to gifts for me and he’s always able to pick out some great things that I love. I won’t praise him too much on his shopping ability though just in case his buddies might be reading this…
I guess I don’t have an answer for how to make this easier (though I am wide open to friendly suggestions). I hope that maybe I’ll outgrow my crazy ways and eventually settle into a calm and relaxing holiday season. Maybe as I get older I’ll realize that things don’t have to be perfect in order for my family to enjoy Christmas. Maybe I’ll be able to say no to the unnecessary obligations that keep me running in a million different directions. Or, maybe I should pick up a TON of clearance gift sets and brace myself for next year. Just a thought.
