Seventh Grade Camp

This was the year Zoe attended 7th grade camp. She begged me to go along as a chaperone for the week - how sweet is that? - so I agreed. BEST TIME EVER.

I really wasn't sure how it would go. Would I be cool enough? Fun enough? Could I keep order with all the girls in my cabin? Could I survive any girl drama that might pop up? I shouldn't have worried at all.

The chaperones got to the camp before the kids so we had time to look around and get our bags unpacked. Most importantly, adults got first choice of bunk. Critical decision. Lower bunk, closest to the bathroom? Yes please. I was one of the lucky ones and was assigned to one of the "lodges". That translates to heat and A/C (sort of), bathrooms and showers IN the lodge and close proximity to all activities. Other were not so lucky and ended up in the "Wilderness" cabins. Translation - smells like mold, might have bats and you have to walk to the bathrooms.

We were given our assigned kids almost as soon as they arrived. They were all seated in the outdoor amphitheater and the chaperones were all waiting at the back. They read off the kids names and then they came back to meet us. I don't mean to brag but I truly got a WONDERFUL group of girls. I knew some of them or had at least heard of them through Zoe so they weren't a complete surprise. Still, it was interesting to get to know each one of them and tricky to learn all their names. They were confused about what they should call me - Mrs. Nowak (uh, NO), Zoe's mom, Ms. Arnold?  Instead they settled on calling me "Mom". I was honored and thrilled. Though later, when I would get separated from them and they would all scream "MOM" (at the top of their lungs) I was kind of rethinking that choice. I would then run around, usually in the dark, swooping them up like a bunch of lost lambs.

They had to haul all of their luggage to our cabin and, unfortunately, a few of the girls (or maybe their moms?) overpacked. By a lot. It took some doing to drag it all there but once we got it there we were able to settle in and get to know each other. I had one of the larger groups - 11 girls - so we had a good time talking, laughing and sharing.

Each group of girls traveled with a group of boys which made up our "travel group". We did all of our activities together and also shared all of our meals so I had to learn all the boys names too. Definite challenge for my name recollection skills! I tried to come up with rhymes for their names, "Boisterous Becca" and "Mindful Michael" to name a few.

We did cool things - horseback riding, underground railroad reenactment, nature classes, canoeing - but the coolest thing really was watching these kids grow, learn and interact with each other. At every meal, each table was supposed to have one adult, four girls and four boys. Hard to manage at first but then everyone started to fall in line. I was a fanatic about manners at my table (Zoe was horrified) and gently guided them into understanding how to be polite and how to share. The change from the first day to the last was ASTOUNDING.

At each meal I came up with questions to ask the table. What was the best gift you ever got? What was the best gift you ever gave? Do you have pets? Do you have siblings? What's the coolest thing you did over the summer? Tell the table something they may not know about you? Do you have any special talents? What is your biggest pet peeve? Who is your best friend? What do you like to do?

The rule was that everyone who wanted to share was given a chance to answer the question. The other rule was that everyone at the table had to listen to that answer. Yes, I quizzed them. I would say, "Michael, did you hear what Katie said?" If he didn't, I would have her repeat it. I thought I was annoying them but, by the end of the week, the boys were rushing to sit at my table and saying, "Aren't you going to ask your questions?"

On one of the final days we were scheduled to participate in the Predator/Prey game. Apparently I misunderstood the instructions and thought the game was for the KIDS only. So I showed up in my cute sandals and flowy pants only to be told that I would be part of the turkey flock, made up of my girls. Oh dear. I'm still picking burrs out of those pants....

So here's the thing. The camp was, obviously, for the kids. But I gained so much. It was one of the most wonderful experiences of my adult life. To be given a view inside the minds of 7th grade kids. To hear about their thoughts and fears, to see them interact with each other, to laugh with them. It was a GIFT.

Each night I would try to settle the girls in - not an easy task as you can imagine - and then I would spray each of their pillows with "sleep spray" (lavender and vanilla pillow spray). Once they were all in their beds I would read aloud to them. I brought this crazy old book with me that I hadn't looked at in years.  It was a story about an eccentric pig who falls in love with a statue of a dolphin and they LOVED it. They all lay quietly each night, waiting to hear what happened next. We didn't get a chance to finish the story and I still get girls who come up to me to ask what happened at the end!!

The thing about kids at this age is this - they are absolute sponges. They soak up praise (and negativity) as if it were water. For instance, I had one kid who told me she was lazy. I said,

"Huh. That's weird. I haven't seen you be lazy at all. Why would you say you're lazy?"

She replied, "That's what my mom tells me."

Her mom told her that and she believed it. I had numerous instances of similar conversations throughout the week. Every time I heard something like that I would reply with something positive in the hopes of replacing a negative thought . Kids at this age, though they pretend they don't need you and pretend they're not listening, take in every word you say. Positive, negative or otherwise.

The teachers and administrators at Zoe's school totally get that. They have made a careful study of this age group and they have perfected the proper way to guide these young folks through the rocky road that is middle school. I was thrilled when Max attended the school and thrilled that Zoe is there now. They are amazing people who are REALLY good at what they do and I can't thank them enough for allowing me to go to camp!